Some pics...finally

Soldotna Sunrise

Mount Redoubt

View Not Far from Home (moose on road)

This is me from Becoming Outdoor Women Alaska 2011

T-shirt hanging on a wall in Talkeetna restaurant 2011

This is from a family getaway to Talkeetna last year (that's my family)

Also my family in Talkeetna last year (sorry it's so dark)

Mount Denali (McKinley to those from outside Alaska)

A Random Shop in Talkeetna 2011

I've got more, but these are all more of a winter theme. 

I went to our congregation this morning.  It was really a great time.  We were reading and talking about Exodus 18 and 19.  Ex 19:5 really tugged at my heart where God told the Israelites that if they would obey Him He would make them His special treasure.  When I read that, it makes me long for that and makes me feel jealous of them.  Then I read Titus 2:11-14 and saw where Paul wrote to Titus (a Greek) that if he followed God and obeyed His commands and all that He told Him to do, that He would make Him his own special possession and also that this was a word for all peoples (vs 11).  I am so glad that God opened His heart to the whole world and calls us all to be His special treasure if we will but obey Him and His commands.

On the way home from there, my girls and I sang How He Loves Us, and the song also came to my heart about His Banner over Me is Love.  Sweet times.

I hope you are having a great weekend and draw close to Him also.

I've been offered the job

After a little negotiating, I have a good job offer and I plan on taking it.  If all goes as planned I'll be taking my new job in May.  I'm really glad for it, but feel bad for my new colleague where I am now working.  Where we have 4 and a part time provider now, we will have only 2 and a part time provider by the end of the summer unless they can recruit some more.  I am not the only one leaving, you see, another colleague is leaving as well.  Our new colleague came on at the end of December and I like her a lot.  I hope we can build our friendship even though I won't continue to be around the workplace. 

The last few days I have been convicted of keeping a rein on my tongue.  It is SO HARD to not become part of the constant negativism that is constantly around me at work.  I am at a loss how to turn it around without making myself sound goody two shoes.  I really want to try to be positive.  I will keep praying and hope that God can help.  I guess I can be thankful that I have a good place to practice this difficult skill.  I do admit though, that I fail everyday.  If you think of me, please pray for me.

January 2012 in Summary

We've had an extremely cold January with plenty of snow to boot.  We had a couple of weeks of temps below -10 and 3-4 feet of snow at least.  We're definitely glad now that Tim bought the snowblower this year! 

January 13 I had an interview with Central Peninsula Hospital for an opening they have at one of their clinics.  It has been a long drawn-out process that I sent my resume to be considered last July.  They didn't say anything after my interview until Feb 3, and that offer was pretty low (I'd have to take a $10,000 pay cut :(  ).  I made a counter offer and they are discussing it, so I still wait.  Fortunately I feel I am in a good place in that I do not have to change jobs.

There are a few things I don't like about my current job, but for the most part it isn't horrible.  The bottom line is that I need family medical insurance for my family of six.  I just don't think it is wise to go without it if I have an alternative.  Secondly, I've become pretty set in my Sabbatarian ways (ie, I like to keep the Sabbath on Saturday).  It is a special day to me.  I don't like to have to work on Saturdays, and my current job has not given me any alternatives to that.  I'm glad right now I only work 1 in 5 Saturdays, but if they can work out an acceptable salary, I won't have to work any Saturdays at all.  In November I asked for 1/2 day a week for administrative time in my current job.  They felt all they could give me was 1/2 day a month.  If I get this new job, it is built in for all the medical providers to get 1/2 day a week for administrative work.

Right now my job is doable, and I work with one of my best friends every day.  If the new job doesn't work, I'll still have an income and there are some good things about my current job that I will miss.  For example, I like my dictation alcove.  I've got it set up so that I have lots of helps around me that assist with my coding and such.  I appreciate the support staff that I have.  If I need someone to help with a needy patient who needs a little extra TLC before she goes, there are people who are right there.  Or if I have a coding question, there are about five people I know by name whom I can call and ask for help.  If a patient doesn't have money for their prescriptions they need, we have a full-time person who helps them find a program to get the medicines for free or for low cost, and we have another program in which we can buy the medication for them in extenuating circumstances.  The clinic is there to help people and we get it done!

The girls are doing well at school.  We have a science fair coming up, and we've been planning and starting 3 projects for that.

Well, I've got to go superglue my daughter's papercut.  Sorry I don't have time to edit my ramblings.  I hope it is somewhat coherent.

A review of my day and thoughts

I had some great Bible study this morning.  I have Torah Club 1 that I just started.  I was reading from last week's Torah portion where Jesus healed on the Sabbath.  This led to a more in-depth study of Jesus from John 1 and Genesis 1.  Deep stuff.  Jesus=Torah=God=with God.  How can someone be God and be with God?  Jesus healed on the Sabbath and continues to work on the Sabbath because the Father is working "even now".  I have so much more I need to understand!

I didn't want to quit, but eventually felt the need to go help Tim take our ever-expanding pile of garbage and recycling to the dump.  At the dump I saw a bunch of eagles perched in nearby trees. 

When I got home I put away our Christmas and Hannukah stuff away while listening to some speakers on tape/dvd.  As I hear the story of where antisemitism started, and as I learn about the roots of Christianity and how it became a separate religion, I am turned off from what Christianity has become.  I did Christmas this year, because I am a gentile believer and have many good memories of it.  However, the more I become aware of how Christianity became what it is today, the more I am not sure of what I should do about things like Christmas.

Then I changed around the living room furniture.

Cold and Dark

December is here.  Not much of a day any longer.  It is now 10:10 am and it seems more like 6-7 am.  We're getting snow but not enough to feel like Colorado :D.  

Work has gotten more like normal.  I've gotten out by 5 pm most of the week.  Nice.

Our family visited another church last week, but it didn't feel right.  I don't know if we'll ever fit in to the traditional church again.  After getting a taste of good preaching through Messianic circles, a dose of pediaphile befriending my teenage daughter, and too many years of shallow programming...  We're still looking but we would like to find something real:  believers who will talk to us two weeks in a row, walk with us through wherever the Lord leads us, be willing to discuss the unclear questions, ya know?

We put a up a Christmas tree this year.  It's pretty.  Maybe I'll post some pics soon.

Gotta go.

Summer and Fall 2011

Hey Y'all.  I guess it is time for something to be put down on this blog.  I guess you must all be wondering what happened to me.  Life just isn't the same since moving to Alaska.  I don't have any of the same habits as I used to.  I guess working 50 hours a week will do that to me.

I had a nice summer.  We went to Illinois and Missouri at the end of July/beginning of August and saw most of both sides of our families.  We also got to spend a day at Silver Dollar City.  I love that place and was so happy to be able to bring my family there.

In August I went on a long trip with my 14 year old daughter to Dawson City, canoed 3 days on the Yukon and thoroughly enjoyed camping and hanging out with her and the other junior high and 9th grade students and many parents.

In September my life started getting a little rocky and unpredictable.  I was subpoena'd to go to Denver at the beginning of October to be questioned before a grand jury in a case against my friend and former employer from Colorado.  It was very scary to be questioned before a lawyer and a detective and a DEA special agent for 4.5 hours.  I only spent about 20 minutes before the grand jury, but they also questioned the detective and the DEA agent separately after that and kept me in a witness room for an hour until it was over.  I've never had to do anything like that before. 

About the same time of my subpoena, the my former employer tried to contact me through the YWAM base in Colorado.  I asked the lady who was setting up my travels if it was okay for me to talk to him.  This was a big mistake.  She told the prosecuting lawyer that he tried to contact me and she called me and told me that he broke the terms of his bond by doing that.  Then she said that he said some really negative things about me (his lawyer told me that he didn't say them about me but about another employee who started all his trouble).  Anyway, they tried to send him to jail over it and this week he went back to court and it was all resolved nicely without him having to pay more bond or go to jail.  It is a big relief to me.  I did not have to go back to Colorado for this, and I am thankful for that too.  My name was on TV and in the newspapers in Colorado because of this and that wasn't very cool.

The whole thing, sadly, isn't over yet.  Next summer or fall the big case should go to court and I will likely have to go back for a week or more to testify again.  So far I haven't been charged with anything, but it is really scary and I often can't sleep because my mind is trying to resolve all of my unaswered questions.  Several people have encouraged me to get legal help, but I'm not sure I can afford it.  I'm not sure I can afford not to either.  I keep having to trust God in all of this.

I think this whole thing has turned my world upside down at work also.  I feel quite isolated and don't know who to trust.  It makes me sad when I hear negative things being said about me behind my back, and yet none of them comes to me and asks what has been going on or shows concern.  I used to love my job and felt like I was on good terms with everyone.  Now I feel like I only have a few friends in the clinic.  My best friend in the area works at the clinic and my MA has shown to be a good friend and I am thankful that they are there.  I do have a couple of other friends there too, but like I said above, it is really hard to know who to trust, and at times I get paranoid wondering if all this is going to be a threat to my job.

In October my best friend and I went to a conference on pain management in Seattle.  It was really good, and I appreciated learning all of the stuff on pain management outside of using narcotics. We enjoyed seeing Pikes Market, eating good food at a Nepali/Tibetan/Indian authentic restaurant, and doing some shopping too.

The snow has started since October 31, and we have about a foot on the ground.   Tim bought a snowblower today, and that will be a great blessing for him.

I guess that is about all my news for now.

Carol